I'm terrified of you dying before me/so my heart skips a beat/whenever we cross a street even though there are no cars in the distance. Definitely why I check on you at night sometimes to ensure that (even though you're six) you're still breathing. I'm so afraid of....that I dread a call from your school telling me of some tragedy and I think of locking us away. AS IF I CAN CONQUER DEATH by keeping you close to my side. I'm so afraid of losing you since I learned from my grandmother that a parent Can live long past a child and my heart breaks cause I don't see how I can ever survive beyond you. I'm so afraid that I would rather not think of that possibility and simply hug you just a little too tight, kiss you just a little too much and tell you each night how much I love you while foolishly believing that somehow you will live forever. Cause that's what a mother needs to do.
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